Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Mike McGuire: A Sadist with a Heart


"I understand that torture isn't something that's to be all that fond of."
So says Mike McGuire in one of his more feculent "dispatches" from the Socialist Gulag. Good for you Mike, good for you.
Gee, I thought all along that waterboarding doesn't work, that roughing up terrorist scum isn't the way to interogate them because it's counter-productive. Well, it appears the bleeding hearts were wrong...
Well, Mikey, I don't suppose it would do any good to point out that in fact there has never been any evidence that torture is an effective means of eliciting valid information. Or that many people more enlightened than you (and I'm guessing that's a pretty big list) have dismissed it as unreliable. Or that lack of efficacy is not the only thing that "bleeding hearts" have against the practice of physically and psychologically abusing another human being. Seems ethics, a basic sense of human decency...and...oh yeah..the law are hardly the types of things one has time to ponder when shrieking for the heads of one's enemies from the chilly depths of the socialist gulag.

In case you're wondering, Mike is referring to a recent admission that the CIA used waterboarding on an Al Qaeda prisoner, and "broke" him in 35 seconds. What the "dispatch" fails to mention is that the CIA was so proud of their accomplishments in this regard, they decided to destroy the video evidence. And as Wonkette observes:
Um, hey, buddy? If it only takes about 30 seconds of non-torture-y waterboarding to break a senior terrorist dude, then either waterboarding is way more torture-iffic than you really know, or the guy’s such a pussy you probably didn’t need to torture him in the first place to get the information out of him. I’m just sayin’.
But maybe my heart doth bleed too much. Maybe we should torture them all! And since Mike is so convinced that these kind of techniques don't cause "death or long term physical damage", maybe we could start with him! If the CIA strapped a car battery to his genitalia, he'd probably fess up to the JFK assassination. And 5 bucks says he'd do it in less than 35 seconds. Any takers?

Update: Courtesy of Canadian Cynic, turns out that Mike's shining example of waterboarding success is a little less than advertised. The CIA found Zubaydah was "certifiably insane" and knew "nothing about terrorist organizations". No soup for you, Mike!

Monday, December 10, 2007

The Gospel According to KKKate: More Guns!


Just when you think the Blogging Tories couldn't get any dumber, they manage to defy expectations. The latest blast of douchebaggery comes from Small Dead Brains where Kate has managed to seize upon the recent spate of gun violence in American churches.

Normally, after a shooting spree, the conversation between a normal person and a Blogging Tory goes something like this:

Normal Person: This is tragic.

BT: What's tragic is that the Communist Fiberals won't let us defend ourselves by carrying concealed automatic weapons.

Normal Person: Don't you think it's a little dangerous to have everyone walking around with concealed weapons?

BT: Fuck you, leftard.

Normal Person: Umm, that's not really an argument.

BT: Heil Hitler.

Normal Person: What did you say??

BT: HAROOJAHHH

Normal Person: That's not even a word.

After the recent tragic shootings the the YWAM in Arvada and the New Life Church in Colorado Springs (not to mention the mall shooting in Omaha), I was hopeful that usual right-wing cries for further weaponization would be muted by the obvious absurdity of suggesting that ordinary churchgoers should carry concealed weapons and use them to blow away potential attackers in the middle of their congregation. Absurdity be damned, says Kate - arm 'em all!

Referring to a story about Pastor Boyd praising a security guard for shooting the New Life attacker, Kate starts off by complaining:
Here's a detail they may have left out of your morning news. I know they left it out of mine.
Oooooh, those sneaky moonbats at....CNN. Trying to slip that story by you by posting it on their website...how frightfully devious of them! And she ends with this steaming turd of anti-intellectual tripe:
When you legislate gun-free zones, only the mass murderers have guns.
The very thought of Blogging Tories and SDA commenters running around with concealed weapons should make us all profoundly scared. Because when you arm the Blogging Tories, only the idiots have guns.